The first red rays of sunlight pierced the early dawn,
As I awakened from my restful slumber with a yawn.
My eyes were not prepared for the sight that greeted me.
But a little voice inside me encouraged me to flee.
I hastened to awaken my tent mate sleeping there.
I reached across the tent and jerked him by his hair.
He voiced his disapproval at my lack of savoirfaire',
And offered me suggestions, I'm not obliged to share.
I said, perchance, do you perceive that creature sitting there,
The one with the long black silky fur, eating your underwear.
With words of exclamation that I cannot repeat,
He endeavored to create a path to hasten his retreat.
A brand new exit suddenly appeared upon our tent.
And through this vented aperture, my partner quickly went.
Without hesitation, I followed in his wake,
And together, through the morning mist we made good our escape.
With wings upon our feet, we flew up the nearest tree.
I glanced over at my partner, and he looked back at me.
"Whatever shall we do now, he queried with disgust."
"I am not quite sure." I said, "but do something, we must."
"We're sitting in this tree dressed only in our underwear,
While all our food and clothing are being eaten by a bear."
We sat and watched and shivered as the bear enjoyed his feast.
And we hoped for a quick departure of the foul smelling beast.
The big black ugly creature quickly ripped our tent to shreds,
Then followed with our sleeping bags, our pillows and our beds.
He scattered all our cooking gear and rummaged through our food.
And chewed up all our clothing, which we considered rude.
He left our camp in shambles then started lumbering toward our tree.
The hulking beast came over and looked right up at me.
"Could one of you fellows help me?" The bear said with a yawn.
"I've searched through everything but I cant find the Grey Poupon."
by Gary Olsen
Inspired by sleeping in a tent in bear country!
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